gym membership guilt

I've got a gym membership, like a good girl in her 20s should. Sweat Fitness in Philly. It's a nice enough gym, not too expensive if they give you the special holiday discounts, and clean. Kinda industrial-cool decor. And I do enjoy working out, using my body, and feeling strong doing it. But I have never felt such guilt as I do each day when I look at my innocent little gym card on my key ring and think how long it's been since I've swiped it on my way in the building. 

There's something just so seemingly good about people who go to the gym regularly. That trim lady with the enviable triceps who is there, every morning, virtuously working her body. The buff guy, staring himself in the mirror while he crunches his obliques. Clearly, these people just have that discipline and are just simply better people than mere mortals like myself, who would often prefer to stay in bed that extra hour or just go home and take off my shoes after a long day on my feet.

The problem here lies in two things: that we attribute being good with going to the gym/being fit and that we use such black and white thinking around fitness and body.

If we don't go to the gym, we are bad, fat, lazy, and likely to get diabetes and die early. If we do go to the gym, we are thin, light, virtuous, good people. It's one or the other The fitspo on Pinterest (ya know the ones: pictures of  disembodied taught abs with words like "Sweat is fat crying"  and "Train insane or remain the same" that are supposed to inspire you towards fitness) does nothing but promote this black and white thinking--either you are working towards improving your body and hitting the gym, or you're a lazy slob with a muffin top. Staying wrapped up in such self-promoted guilt makes it easy for women to be exploited or distracted from real issues or just enjoying our lives.

So do your best to do what feels good for you, whether that's a strict gym routine or a more relaxed approach to fitness. When the black and white thinking and guilt creep in, remind yourself that fitness is not a measure of your inherent goodness and that you are already enough, dusty gym membership and all.

Much love,
The Sheriff

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